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The doggone girl is mine. by ~earthbound-fan:iconearthbound-fan:



Hey everyone, I came up with this fantasy right now. Ahem, I'll write it out like a skit.

Int. Day - Disney Studios

earthbound-fan, a high ranking executive sits at his desk in an expensive Italian suit.

disneygirl enters, looking shy and nervous. She is wearing a blue gown, like in her art.

EARTHBOUND-FAN
So, I've heard your quite the artitste, and quite a disneyfan as well.

DISNEYGIRL

(blushes)
Yes, it's been my lifelong dream.

EARTHBOUND-FAN
Well, let's take a look at what you got.

disneygirl, shyly takes out her folder of her drawing samples.

EARTHBOUND-FAN
No, no, no. I didn't mean that...

disneygirl looks up at him...
LATER...

disney girl slowly removes her blue gown. earthbound-fan looks at her like a cyborg-bear in heat.

DISNEYGIRL
I...I haven't had too much experience with this.

EARTHBOUND-FAN
I know, I read your profile.

disneygirl is just about to lie down on the desk when...coppertopdragon appears!

COPPERTOPDRAGON
Cease and desist! You're no highranking disney exeutive! You're that no good, womanizing, earthbound-fan!

EARTHBOUND-FAN
Drat! Foiled again.

COPPERTOPDRAGON
Come, my lady, and let us desert this faux-office post-with!

DISNEYFAN
I...I can't go with you, coppertopdragon.

COPPERTOPDRAGON
My lady, don't thou toyest with me so!

DISNEYFAN
The truth is...I think of you as a brother...(a brother, a brother...)

The sound of her last words echoes in his mind.

earthbound-fan gets a devious look on his face!

LATER…

Coppertopdragon is suspened over a cauldron of boiling oil by his left leg. Earthbound-fan stands above him laughing!

EARTHBOUND-FAN

Recant! For you have sinned against the church!

COPPERTOPDRAGON

I know not of what thou speakest!

EARTHBOUND-FAN

Oh stop being so melodramatic!

COPPERTOPDRAGON

What makes you think disneygirl will ever fall in love with you! At least I’m like a brother to her, you’re like a stranger!

EARTHBOUND-FAN

(singing quietly)
Strangers in the night, exchanging glances…

COPPERTOPDRAGON

And what’s more, thou hast no idea where thou is going with this skit!
A terrified look comes across earthbound fan’s face….

Earthbound-fan stands stunned.

EARTHBOUND-FAN

You’re right. I have no idea where I’m going with this…

DISNEYGIRL

But I do!

Both  men look over to see Disneygirl, standing there in all her girlish glory.

COPPERTOPDRAGON

My lady! Didst thou come to save me? Her knight in shining armor?

DISNEYGIRL

Nope, I came to do this!

She throws a dagger at the rope that’s suspending coppertopdragon above the oil. The rope is severed and coppertopdragon plummets into the oil. All we hear is a splash and some horrible screams.

DISNEYGIRL

You wanted to know how the skit ends?

EARTHBOUND-FAN

I think we both know how it ends…

They tenderly embrace, and they’re lips are drawn together almost magnetically.

But just as they are about to kiss…

Peewee Herman jumps in between them ruining the moment!

PEEWEE HERMAN

Hah! Hah! I don’t make dogs, I just train em!

THE END…?
Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
:iconearthbound-fan:

Author's Comments

In my first piece, you can clearly see the Jungian archetypes being fleshed out in the characters of earthbound-fan, disneygirl, and coppertopstooge.

Comments


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:iconjohn-the-enforcer:
Earthbound was never popular here in the 'States...Japan, big time...USA, no.

Which still makes me wonder why in God's good name they decided to add that little beady-eyed chicken-wuss Ness to the Smash Bros. series in the first place!

When I first saw the little homunculus in the first Smash Bros. game, I was like, "WHO THE HELL IS THAT?!" My brother Dave seems to think he's cool (for some ungodly reason), but all the good I see of him (and his equally obnoxious clone Lucas in Brawl) is as TARGET PRACTICE!

In short...Earthbound and all its unholiness therein suck, all other Nintendo franchises rule.

--
"GET OFFA DERE, YOU KOOKY FLY, YOU!!!"-Professor Ludwig Von Drake, from the Disney special, "Inside Outer Space"...fave quote of his, btw...:XD:
:iconjohn-the-enforcer:
Amen, brother. Amen. ^^

--
"GET OFFA DERE, YOU KOOKY FLY, YOU!!!"-Professor Ludwig Von Drake, from the Disney special, "Inside Outer Space"...fave quote of his, btw...:XD:
:iconjohn-the-enforcer:
That coming from the numbskull who worships Earthbound like it's the freakin' Holy Grail...and can't even get DisneyFAN-01's name right.

Look, bud, just save yourself from embarassment later, and leave both DisneyFan-01 and Coppertopdragon alone, capiche?

--
"GET OFFA DERE, YOU KOOKY FLY, YOU!!!"-Professor Ludwig Von Drake, from the Disney special, "Inside Outer Space"...fave quote of his, btw...:XD:
:icondizzyupthegurl0o0:
this makes me happy inside lol

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April 27, 2008
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